I Hit a Wall? Where Did My Motivation Go?
Lacking motivation is a real confidence stealer.
Sometimes when I only feel like eating chips and binge watching The Property Brothers on HGTV, I have the thought that I will never find my way back to putting in the work necessary to grow my business.
Then more thoughts like that cascade through my brain.
- “I’m too old for this. No wonder I don’t have the motivation anymore.”
- “How can anyone be expected to do everything?”
- “I don’t think I can do this anymore.”
- “I have no idea what I am doing.”
Negative thoughts beget negative thoughts. It is the Law of Attraction only in reverse.
Motivation is not a mystery. It’s part of being human.
With motivation we stand up and go walking, make food, scroll our phones.
It’s part of our system of will. Without will, we would not be able to lift a finger.
But, when faced with growing a business, there are many things that can dampen a coach’s motivation.
Here are the top 5 reasons we lose our Mojo!
1. We don’t have a powerful enough “Why.”
Why are you doing what you are doing?
Purpose is extremely motivating.
But many business owners, even coaches don’t dig deeply enough into their why and hence don’t have that tool to help them when they feel unmotivated.
You want to really understand why your work is important to you.
It needs to touch you deeply, not superficially.
- Is it a calling?
- Have you dreamed of it all your life?
- Do you feel like it can change lives, yours and others?
- Is there something even higher than that?
- Does it feel like karma unfolding?
- Is it your Dharma?
Work on your why and pull it out when you lose motivation. The energy of your why will invigorate you.
2. We need a target, a goal, a vision of something tangible to go after.
I admit, I can over plan.
It kind of calms me down.
But to be fair, it also sets me up each day for the tasks I need to do to move my business forward toward my bigger goal.
It is very unmotivating to have an endless task list with no vision of where these tasks are going.
Vision is huge for keeping you motivated.
3. Being “lazy” is part of your identity.
This one hits close to home for me.
For years, I saw myself as someone who lacked discipline, tended towards laziness, and well, was a loser.
Some of this was because I didn’t have control over what now I see is a sugar/carb addiction.
I was using carbs and sugar as an “antidepressant” of sorts, a mood alterer because I was in fact depressed.
I couldn’t control my eating. But even after I understood that, and let go of the identity of lacking discipline, I still held the identity of someone who didn’t work hard enough to be really successful.
That’s a very unmotivating self-image.
I had to really work through that when I started university at age 33.
And so I did. I worked really hard and proved to myself I could do it.
But why? Why could I do it there and not in the music business?
Because, music wasn’t my thing.
Talent or no talent, it wasn’t what I really wanted in life and hence I had no motivation to do the amount of work needed to really prosper.
University, which was what I really wanted, helped me to change that “lazy, unmotivated” identity.
Identity can influence all our actions and non-actions.
It’s important to refine it and create one that motivates you and supports your goals.
4. Your goal bores you!
Is your goal big enough to excite you?
Does it push you so much you have a little bit of stress around it?
Stress can really help performance. And if your goal is dull, if it’s the same one day after day, you may just be bored.
Take some risks.
Stretch that goal. Be outrageous and see if that gets your juices going.
Add fun. Add music. Add Midliner colourful markers to your daily planner!!!
Whatever gives you some excitement to that goal will help with your motivation.
Think about it, do you get excited to cook a dinner that you’ve eaten four times already this week? Probably not.
Shake it up a little.
5. You’re scared.
Most of the people I work with have to do the personal growth work of managing their fears.
No matter what stops their business growth, it usually comes down to fear.
Lack of motivation is no different.
It can be fear of failure. And it can be fear of success.
I know, who’d be afraid of success?
But it can be scary when you think that you might have to work even harder when you have more success.
It can be fear of what people will say. That’s a big one. They have their parent’s voices in their heads, or friends or even their culture.
It’s not easy doing something that is out of the norm for our family and friends.
There is a reason humans formed tribes. There is safety in numbers.
Doing something outside the tribe feels dangerous. Hence, you will lack motivation.
No matter what your fear, it’s hugely important to learn to act in spite of the fear and to let it go.
There is a cool acronym for fear: False, Evidence, Appearing, Real.
Fear is not real.
It’s an emotional response in your body that you can manage and act in spite of. And when you do, you will feel exhilarated.
Mel Robbins says the fear and excitement are the same feeling in your body.
They release the same hormones.
So she suggests we all reframe that “fear” and call it “excitement.”
I love that. And it really works.
Don’t worry if you hit a wall in your work.
It’s bound to happen.
Think of it as time to:
- and up your game by revamping your WHY,
- setting a tangible goal or two,
- recreate your self-image and identity by stepping into the next level version of yourself,
- create a goal that really excites you, suits you, that you really resonate with,
- and work on letting go of your fears.
Do the personal growth work, or what I call the “inner game” and you’ll get full of enthusiasm again to go after your dreams.
See you next time,