Surrender is the ultimate sign of strength and the foundation for a spiritual life. Surrendering affirms that we are no longer willing to live in pain. It expresses a deep desire to transcend our struggles and transform our negative emotions.
For the last 25 years, I have worked with people who are interested in personal growth and self-improvement, and are looking for guidance and support to achieve their goals.
I have a lot of tools.
Believe me when I say that. I’ve been studying as a seeker and as a professional for my whole life.
I studied psychology and religious studies in school. My master’s degree is in counselling. You can imagine how much studying went into that.
I remember doing Yoga with my mother in our living room when I was still a kid. And watching both my parents take on improving their mental health when nobody, and I mean nobody did that.
There was a huge stigma around that in the 50’s and 60’s. And yes, I know. There still is.
But not in my circles.
Most everyone I know or work with is dedicated to finding themselves, growing themselves, and getting the most out of life.
They work hard. I work hard. We all work hard.
And you know what?
It’s too much.
It’s too hard.
So…I Give UP!
The other day, after listening to Abraham-Hicks….. I declared to the universe and anyone who could pick up my vibration, that I Give Up.
When I shared my declaration with others, it bothered a few people. They wanted me to change my words to something less defeatist, like letting go.
But I protest.
Giving up is exactly what all the spiritual teachers and spiritual texts have been instructing us to do for thousands of years.
If we’re looking for inner peace, success in achieving our goals, making more money, or finding ourselves, it doesn’t seem to matter what we’re craving, the instructions are the same:
Surrender
The Counter Intuitive Power of Surrender
I know right?
Doesn’t giving up mean you don’t get anything? You let life pass you by?
How is it possible that giving up could actually be the answer for more deliberate manifestation of your goals and dreams.
It’s not just counter intuitive. It’s a downright paradox.
By giving up you gain. What?
I wrote my Master’s thesis on the Power of Surrender.
I had been working in an alcohol and drug treatment centre and the clients who embraced the ideas from the 12-steps of AA, specifically Let Go and Let God, seemed to be the most successful.
By letting go of trying to control their addiction, they actually stopped their addictive use.
This fascinated me so much, I just had to learn more.
And so I studied them and so much more over the years.
As a result, I have come up with some conclusions about this. Here they are!
What are we actually giving up?
First of all, what exactly are we giving up?
It’s not about admitting defeat about life, it’s about admitting defeat about how we’ve been approaching life.
Here’s a shortlist of behaviour change:
1. We are giving up trying to control the uncontrollable.
2. We are giving up our focus on the things that aren’t working.
3. We are giving up our excuses for feeling bad.
4. We are giving up trying so hard.
Oh Yes. That last one really speaks to me.
I’m sorry, but trying to “pivot” a few years back and create a whole new type of business model, online, because of the pandemic has exhausted me.
I’m giving up trying so hard.
Can I interrupt for one second?
Okay, now where was I?
What To Focus On Instead
Instead, I am focusing on feeling good.
Yes, you heard that right. I am focused on feeling good.
And here’s the science behind why.
We know from science and traditional and modern metaphysical teachings that we live in a vibrational reality. Simply put, everything is energy. I mean everything.
And it’s rate of vibration determines whether it’s animal, mineral or spiritual.
All we have is vibrating energy that moves at differing and infinite rates of frequencies. Add to that the powerful law of cause and effect, or recently known as The Law of Attraction, we have the realization that like vibration attracts like vibration.
Here’s how it shows up in our lives.
Take me for example 😊.
If I am struggling, trying so hard to figure out what to post on Instagram, where my next client is coming from, and is there anybody out there reading my blogs and newsletter, what, by the law stated above, am I going to attract back?
You got it.
More of the same. More struggle, struggle, struggle. Frankly, I’m tired.
Now, I’ll let you in on a little secret. Struggle is my middle name!
When I lived in New York City, I attended some acting classes at a theatre in the Village. The teacher had this “weird” exercise where the student had to stand before the class, and just before their monologue, repeat the word the teacher suggested.
Each student walked up onto the stage, and before you knew it they were crying and all emotional from repeating this magical word.
It was supposed to be a way to connect with your emotions so you could do the monologue better.
I didn’t believe it for a minute.
I thought, “Hey, this is an acting class. They’re acting.”
And then it was my turn.
First, I did the monologue once to some okay reviews. And then she gave me my word. I repeated the word three times out loud and by 2.5 I was starting to heave with tears.
I then did the monologue again with these free floating emotions.
And wow. It was incredible. I had no idea I could even act!!!
And the word? You guessed it. The word was Struggle with a capital “S.”
It seemed my struggle with life was all over my face. 😫
So, yet again, I declare my intention to give up.
Think Carrie Underwood. Jesus Take the Wheel
Think Frozen. Let it Go
Yes, giving up actually feels intoxicating like when I sing along to those songs.
If YOU try it, just be clear what you are giving up.
Bottom line, you’re giving up trying to make things happen a certain way.
You are giving up making demands of the universe and instead, learning to raise your vibration to a place where you are feeling good, inspired, excited, peaceful and happy.
According to Arbraham-Hicks, the solutions to all our stressors already exist in the realm of vibration. It’s our job to match it.
Solutions live in the world of feeling good.
There you go. Please, excuse me now, while I take some time in my day to sing along to those songs above. They make me happy every time.
And that’s my job from here on in…to be happy.
And music has always been able to do that.
Talk again soon.
Oh, and btw… Don’t worry. Be happy. Bobby McFerrin
Love ❤️
PS. Exciting news. I have an article on Tiny Buddha and it is now live. It’s about dealing with regrets. Check it out HERE