Instead of looking forward to some ideal person I was hoping to be, and always falling short…I started looking back at all I had actually already accomplished in my life.
How To Stop Doubting Yourself Today!
STRATEGY: Remember Your Past Achievements
When I was 8 or 9 years old, I won best athlete of the city I lived in. It was a smallish town, but it was big enough to have an awards ceremony at the Bandstand in the middle of Queenβs Park.
I won a bunch of other awards too. Some of them, athletic. Others for singing and performing.
I was a pretty confident kid. π And then stuff happened.
My parents divorced. My mother and I moved to a big city, leaving my father and my friends behind. Oh right, and puberty. It was too much stuff.
And I stopped winning awards. In fact, I stopped competing altogether.
Instead, I became full of doubts. Well, more accurately, full of self-doubts.
Where did that confident kid go?
It took several decades for me to find her again.
How did I stop doubting myself?
Here’s how. And you can do it too, today!
Instead of looking forward to some ideal person I was hoping to be, and always falling short…I started looking back at all I had actually already accomplished in my life.
I learned this in a coaching course called Coach and Grow Rich.Β They called it a Belief Narrative.
Itβs powerful.
Instead of conjuring up all the reasons why I couldn’t do something, I listed all the reasons why I could, based on evidence from the past.
Itβs amazing how we forget our own strengths and achievements. And how we take everything for granted. I mean, donβt I walk, talk, read and add up numbers? Donβt I maintain a home, cook a meal, support myself as a self-employed person? Havenβt I lived in NYC and Los Angeles and Toronto and made wonderful friends? Oh, I learned to drive. And didnβt I drive in all those crazy places to drive?
While Iβm on a rant, didnβt I take myself to Europe in my thirties for 2.5 months with 300 dollars in my pocket?
If you’ve been enjoying the blog,Β join my community by tapping on this link. You will get a lovely free PDF about 30 Journal Prompts to Live Life Fully.
Sometimes, I canβt even believe everything I have accomplished in my life. The list is actually endless.And that is exactly how I, and you can stop doubting yourself.
Come up with the evidence that proves you can accomplish the goal you are after.
Yes, yes, yes, I bet you can find all the reasons you canβt do it. Thatβs easy.
Iβm suggesting you turn your head around, and look at your past for the evidence that can shore up your confidence.
If you accomplished anything, you can use that knowledge to remind yourself you can accomplish other things going forward.
And itβs okay to start small. If you are someone who walks, and learned to walk, count that as an accomplishment. You know how hard that was? If you are someone who can read, well, here again, remind yourself of that.
Whatever your circumstances, focus on all youβve done in your life.
Hereβs the sentence I used myself and that I give to my clients: I believe I can β¦..(fill in your goal or dream here) because I β¦β¦.(fill in the evidence of your past accomplishment).
I believe I can build and run a successful personal coaching business because in the past, I learned to play the guitar and sing well enough to perform a whole night in a club. That shows I can put my mind to a goal and achieve it. It shows me I have persistence, and focus when I set my mind to something. I believe this proves I can achieve this goal too.
πΊπΎAnd then dance like nobodyβs watching. Self-doubts are really just thoughts that are there to keep us in our comfort zone. They arenβt true. They donβt have to have power if we decide to take away that power.
I know you can accomplish what you were meant to accomplish in this world.
NOTE: Make sure your goal or dream is right for you. Because really, even with all my belief in myself, I really donβt think I could have been an astronaut!!!!!
Make sure your dream and goal is right for you, and then focus on all the evidence proving you can accomplish it. And watch those self-doubts fade away. β
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