How To Stop Doubting Yourself Today!
When I was 8 or 9 years old, I won best athlete of the city I lived in. It was a smallish town, but it was big enough to have an awards ceremony at the Bandstand in the middle of Queen’s Park.
I won a bunch of other awards too. Some of them, athletic. Others for singing and performing.
I was a pretty confident kid. 🏆
And then stuff happened.
My parents divorced. My mother and I moved to a big city, leaving my father and my friends behind.
Oh right, and puberty.
It was too much stuff.
And I stopped winning awards. In fact, I stopped competing altogether.
Instead, I became full of doubts. Well, more accurately, full of self-doubts.
Where did that confident kid go?
It took several decades for me to find her again.
How did I stop doubting myself?
Here’s how. And you can do it too, today!
STRATEGY: Remember Your Past Achievements
Instead of looking forward to some ideal person I was hoping to be, and always falling short…I started looking back at all I had actually already accomplished in my life.
It’s powerful.
Instead of conjuring up all the reasons why I couldn’t do something, I listed all the reasons why I could, based on evidence from the past.
It’s amazing how we forget our own strengths and achievements. And how we take everything for granted.
I mean, don’t I walk, talk, read and add up numbers? Don’t I maintain a home, cook a meal, support myself as a coach? Haven’t I lived in NYC and Los Angeles and Toronto and made wonderful friends? Oh, I learned to drive. And didn’t I drive in all those crazy places to drive?
While I’m on a rant, didn’t I take myself to Europe in my thirties for 2.5 months with 300 dollars in my pocket?
Sometimes, I can’t even believe everything I have accomplished in my life. The list is actually endless.
And that is exactly how I, and you can stop doubting yourself.
Come up with the evidence that proves you can accomplish the goal you are after.
Yes, yes, yes, I bet you can find all the reasons you can’t do it.
That’s easy.
I’m suggesting you turn your head around, and look at your past for the evidence that can shore up your confidence.
If you’ve accomplished anything, you can use that knowledge to remind yourself you can accomplish other things.
And it’s okay to start small.
- If you are someone who walks, and learned to walk, count that as an accomplishment. You know how hard that was?
- If you are someone who can read, well, here again, remind yourself of that.
Whatever your circumstances, focus on all you’ve done in your life.
Here’s the sentence I used myself in my journal, and I still use today with my clients:
I believe I can …..(fill in your goal or dream here) because I …….(fill in the evidence of your past accomplishment).
I believe I can build and run a successful personal coaching business because in the past, I learned to play the guitar and sing well enough to perform a whole night in a club. That shows I can put my mind to a goal and achieve it. It shows me I have persistence, and focus when I set my mind to something. I believe this proves I can achieve this goal too.
🕺🏾And then dance like nobody’s watching.
Self-doubts are really just thoughts that are there to keep us in our comfort zone.
They aren’t true. They don’t have to have power if we decide to take away that power.
I know you can accomplish what you were meant to accomplish in this world.
I know because I’ve helped dozens of people just like you be successful.
NOTE: Make sure your goal or dream is right for you. Because really, even with all my belief in myself, I really don’t think I could have been an astronaut!!!!!
Once you know it’s the right dream for you, then focus on all the evidence proving you can accomplish it. And watch those self-doubts fade away.
⛅️🌤☀️
